One interview will be performed by a guy. I did some Google Kung Fu and found that he has a Master's degree, but no PhD. As I've discussed before on this blog, I am able to find ways to put myself down in the most ridiculous ways possible. In this case, I am worried that I won't know something as well as he does (and seriously, who could blame me, I'm DEEP but not necessarily BROAD), and he will be like, "How can this chick have a PhizzleDizzle? She doesn't know anything." Somehow, I put more pressure on myself to super perform because I will be interviewed by someone with an MS. Is that not insane?
The other interview will be performed by a female PhD. At first I thought, "Oh, nice, a woman." But then I thought, "Oh shit, a woman." Because sometimes women can be so hard on other women, particularly in fields where there aren't a lot of women. Maybe she will think I will make women like her look bad if I say something stupid. I don't know. I've experienced this sort of woman-on-woman treatment before, and even been a perpetrator myself at times (to my chagrin). Maybe she will be a hard-ass. Maybe she will hold me to a super-high standard because she thinks in order to succeed as a woman in my field, you have to kick way more ass than a dude.
Maybe, maybe, maybe. Basically, I am thinking of ways to make myself nervous. And it alarms me that I had a negative gender response in this case. Actually, I had a positive, and a negative response, in rapid succession. I don't know.
Just tell me to stop overthinking and wish me luck.