Lately I find myself occasionally consumed with panic that I will not find a job.
On the one hand, not being able to find a job is bad enough, but on the other, I know that me being unable to find a job would be indicative of SERIOUS problems with the economy. In other words, it's like, "who cares if I can't find a job that I want when we are in the midst of the Great Depression Part II?" My whole worldview will be skewed and all the rules of life which I have carefully learned may not apply. We have plenty of savings, but they've largely been cut in half and if things continue the way they are, who cares how much cushion of savings you have? One time I said to a friend that I like to make sure that I'll be ok even in the worst of times, like apocalyptic times, and he said, "If it's the apocalypse, who cares? It's the apocalypse." That's sort of how I'm feeling now. I'm supposed to be seriously in demand, and I think I'm not.
On the other, I tell myself to stop being such a boob.
I talk to so few people in the world, my bubble is so small, and all the people I have talked have said that things are rough and they'll let me know if the purse strings loosen up....I cannot get a real idea of how it's going to be.
It's driving me crazy. I just want....to know, already. What am I going to be doing in a few months? I don't have a fucking clue.
1 year ago